February 2012
24 posts
2 months
Today marks 2 months since the day you left.. Only God knows how I can make it till this day. Everyday went by so slow that I just wanted to cry. It was painful, it still is. The silent treatment you gave and still giving, it’s a killer. It seriously breaks me into pieces that even I, myself don’t know what else to do. I’m pretty much making myself busy so that the day would go...
“If I could punch you right now, I seriously would cause you’re getting on...”
“Talking about the past. It makes me devastated. Life..”
Thinking of everything that we’ve went through together. Why must it end? How could it end? It’s sad. Everything that we’ve fought through together to stay strong, everything we had to fight to be together, didn’t you think of that? Everything that we’ve sacrificed for each other, didn’t you think of that? There were things that tried to stop us from being...
50 days
Today marks the 50th day. Ive come this far, I cant break down again. But there’s just times when I need to break down and cry. I am extremely tired of pretending that I am fine. Some people believed the laughter I gave, the smile I put on my face but some can see that I am just covering things up. But honestly, no one knows the battle I have to go through every single day. Up to this point,...
I’ve been strong for so long. I don’t want to break down now. I can’t help it but to cry. I’ve been holding it in for the past month, tears can’t help but to fall down tonight. God, help me. Guide me through. I know only You can help me. Give me the strength to go on and be strong. This pain I’m feeling, is a sign that I truthfully and sincerely love him but...
“Tomorrow is just another day.”
“Misery”
Scream it out, shout it out, cry it out, laugh it out.. I’ve tried in every possible way, but why am I feeling trapped still? Why am I still suffering?
God, cut me out of this misery please. Only You can help me. Only to You, I believe. Only to You I surrender. Only You.
“I can’t stand the thought of you being with anyone else.”
“Not living with you is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.”
“I’m confused. You’re confusing me. Stop this.”
Not over you
Dreams, that’s where I have to go
to see your beautiful face anymore
I stare at a picture of you and listen to the radio
Hope, hope there’s a conversation
we both admit we had it good but
until then it’s alienation, I know, that much is understood
And I realize
If you ask me how I’m doin I would say I’m doin just fine
I would lie and say that you’re not...
“And I know it’s only my mind. That I’m talking to myself and not to...”
Away
Been out of Subang for the past few days and today, the second i entered Subang, my heart dropped. My heart doesn’t belong here anymore. Can I say that I want to move? Away? Somewhere far? Seriously. One day. I’ve gotta be strong for my family. That’s my priority. Hold on
“If you could read my mind, you’d know that Ive never stopped thinking...”
“God give me the strength please..”
“Sometimes I wish I could punch you, lock you in a room and make you think of how...”
Believe
God is really testing me. But I know He will guide me through it as well. I’ve been strong for a month plus, I can go through this with His help.